Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Stinkin' Hard Days

Benjamin laughing "with" the veteran in a wheelchair at the Bob Hope Tribute in San Diego. He loved that there was a guy in a wheelchair...and since all the statues were laughing, he decided to join right in! Benjamin as King of the World on the newly renovated "It's a Small World" ride in Disneyland in December.

My Benjamin. While I am his mother and therefore admittedly not objective in the least...I think this is one of the greatest kids in the world. The entire world.

Most of the time, this boy of mine has an upbeat attitude that shouts his contentment with who he is -- how God made him -- and what he can do. He has been that way since birth. Just a joy.

But he is 11. And lately, well, he is 11.

Even before we began the home schooling adventure this semester, he was struggling with his friendships. He makes friends very easily -- is outgoing, loves to talk and is just the nicest kid. But did I mention he is 11. Eleven-year-old boys like to do a couple of, and run faster. Usually the running involves a ball of some sort. And my sweet boy, who for years has been content to watch...would just like somebody to like to watch with him.

Today, he looked at me with his precious eyes (the longest eyelashes ever...completely given to him by God in order to bat them at his mommy and get away with all assortment of things!), and said, "Sometimes, Mommy, I just don't like it." I asked him what he meant. Now you should know that for 11 years, this cheerleader of a Mommy has been telling him how God is going to use his Cerebral Palsy for my Benjamin looks at me and says, "I just don't like that wheelchair." (Cause heaven forbid we criticize something God is going to use!)

My initial reaction was my standard, "Ok, well we can decide to feel sorry for ourselves, or we can choose to accept..." (Aren't you glad I'm not YOUR Mom?) but I stopped myself. I sat down beside him and told him, "Yeah. I hear you. Sometimes, it just stinks."

And then he rolled to the kitchen counter, grabbed a left-out Pop Tart and shoved it down. Cause...did I mention, he is 11?!


Tracey said...

Oh Carol! What a wise woman of God you are. That's exactly what Benjamin needed right then. That acknowledgement of his feelings. I will pray for him to find those special friends! And tell him for me that God is ALREADY using his cerebral palsy for good, for through your words he has been the biggest blessing to me. love you all!

Mardi said...

You are such a great mom. I will be looking to you for much advice in the future. :)

Thank you so much for your encouraging words you left on my blog. They meant a lot and have echoed in my mind many times this past week. Thank you.

Well, I'm sure you have Valentine's plans and I hope you have a wonderful week with your big Valentine and all your little ones. :) As for Dan and I we are going to Fleming's for dinner tonight and the spa tomorrow. Oh amd I looking forward to this weekend. :)

Take care! :)